Sunday, May 23, 2010

A MARRIAGE SANS FIGHTS -- CAPT AJIT VADAKAYIL



Sometimes I wonder why my 28 years of marriage has gone smoothly without a single fight.

  
Especially when yours truly is a super strong character, who does not take anything lying down.

One of the factors definitely is -- that i went for an arranged marriage.

Of course we saw each other and gave our consent. Our parents gauged our compatibility. Our horoscopes were matched to see if the most intelligent force blessed the union.

Being a handsome young sailor i had my share of opportunities for a love marriage -- but i knew that love marriages do NOT work.

I wanted a girl who could blush, for the blush is the most powerful charm of a girl's beauty. And is not a blush the color of virtue?

I was acutely aware of the worry and strain of the Western marriage concept where sex plays a major role. When the feelings wane we all know what is in store.

The western marraige is based on lust and feelings , the Eastern on TRUST  honour and committment.  An Indian woman does NOT go for silicon implants to SAVE her marriage.

An arranged marriage is a compromise. It is a 51:49 relationship.

When a cup of tea has to be made there is no doubt who is gonna make it.  When it comes to security of the family there is no doubt who will provide that.

In India the divorce rate is less than 1% while in the west it is greater than 50%.



Country  /     %  Divorce  
Albania /                     19     
Armenia/                     17     
Australia/                    48     
Austria/                       47     
Azerbaijan/                  12     
Bahamas/                     5       
Belarus            /           45     
Belgium/                      71     
Bermuda/                     25     
Bosnia & Herz/             8       
Brazil/                         24     
Bulgaria/                      47      
Canada/                       49  
Chile/                           3       
China/                         22     
Colombia/                    9       
Costa Rica/                  47     
Croatia/                       25     
Cuba/                          53     
Cyprus/                       28     
Czech Republic/           66     
Denmark/                    49     
Dominican Rep/           41     
Ecuador/                     20     
Egypt   /                     17      
El Salvador/                23      
Estonia /                     58     
European Union/          47     
Finland    /                   47     
 France            /           55     
 Georgia/                     19     
 Germany/                   49     
 Gibraltar/                    49     
 Grenada/                    22     
 Greece              /        25     
 Guatemala/                 5       
 Hungary/                    67     
 Iceland           /           37     
India/       0.08          
    


 Iran/                           14     
 Ireland/                       15     
 Israel/                         30     
 Italy    /                      27     
 Jamaica/                      9        
 Japan  /                      36     
 Jordan  /                     25     
 Kazakhstan/               27     
 Kuwait           /           42     
 Kyrgyzstan/                16     
 Latvia /                      52     
 Lebanon/                   17     
 Libya /                        5       
 Liechtenstein  /           48     
 Lithuania/                   53     
 Luxembourg   /           62     
 Mauritius/                   17     
 Mexico  /                    15                 
 Moldova/                    42     
 Mongolia/                   32     
 Montenegro    /           14     
 Netherlands/               46     
 New Zealand /            45     
 Nicaragua/                  17     
 Norway/                     46     
 Panama/                     27     
 Poland            /           28     
 Portugal/                     69     
 Qatar  /                       29     
 Rep of Macedonia/      11      
 Romania         /           28     
 Russia /                       51     
 Saudi Arabia/              20     
 Serbia /                       22     
 Singapore/                  28     
 Slovakia/                    47     
 Slovenia/                    38     
 South Africa/              17     
 South Korea/              35     
 Spain  /                      62     
 Sri Lanka                    0.19               
 Suriname/                   31     
 Sweden/                     49     
 Switzerland/                52     
 Syria   /                       9       
 Tajikistan/                   6       
 Thailand/                    25     
 Trinidad nTobago/     35     
 Turkey   /                   20     
 Ukraine/                     42     
 United Kingdom/         51     
 United States /            56
 Uzbekistan  /              8       
 Venezuela/                 27     
 Vietnam/                    4        


Wrigley's chewing gum and perfumes are a must before a western date-- for the boy and girl must taste their mutual fruits -- before saying YES.

In the Eastern concept the boy gets to taste the fruits , only after the ceremony. It is an exciting period of discovery. Love will follow.

On the GRAPH of love versus time-- on X / Y axis, a love marriage starts at zero time ( wedding night ) on the horizontal axis and 100% love on the vertical axis.

What is already on top cannot go up any more--remember you had been  surviving on love and fresh air and showing only your best behavior and profile to each other , hiding all your warts,  BO with perfume and MO with Wrigleys.

Within two months the index falls like an asymptotic curve.


Everything in life is relative. In one , the index keeps falling , while in the other it has to rise.

For what was this love--just an arrangement of convenience.


If you were staying in Mumbai you fall in love with a girl from Mumbai--if you were in Timbuctoo you fall in love with a girl from there. True love knows no barriers of race, religion or age.

My arranged marriage  started with the index on zero love at zero time. What is already at rock bottom cannot fall any further. It can only go up.  Ego does not play a huge role.

Marriage is an institution which must be respected.


I remember when my crew was Jamaican , and if they did something extraordinary , like winning a race at the Flying Angels athletic meet --

I would pose a question. " Brown , whom did you run for" .

Pat comes the answer " I ran for Maaamma " .

Naturally-- Brown did NOT run for Paaapa because his mother never married,-- she just lived in with lot of men.

digression:--

However here is my self proclaimed answer to the first question --the first line of this piece. At our honeymoon hotel , they had a package for honeymoon couples. There were 12 newly weds in a nice luxury coach.

Our first stop was the Ooty lake. All the eleven couples went for the foot paddle boats. I went for the rowing wooden boat with the heavy oars-- declined the services of a professional rower, and shot off to the other end of the huge lake like an arrow.

Very soon i could see 11 envious ladies cajoling their husbands to be more  romantic ( like me ) and row serenade them ,  instead of forcing them to use their delicate leg power.

 So we had 12 rowing boats in the lake -- pretty soon--with NO professional rowers in them.

Out of these 12 , 11 got stuck in the slush with the grooms unable to row further due to enervated tendons  fatigued muscles and blistered palms -- triggering off a huge rescue operation which took two hours, in front of a huge sniggering crowd.-- what with so much of smeared lipsticks and smudged mascaras--

All 11 genteel brides had panicked and were in tears--some of them wailing loudly.

All 11 grooms gave me dirty looks, for spoiling their party --  Their brides were giving me side glances of admiration.

I could see that my wife was proud of me , for she started holding mE hand -- and she had reprogrammed her DNA to respect me for ever  HA!  ;-).

Below : This picture was taken immediately after the lake rowing incident- my nostrils are dilated and I am sweating and breathing hard - 



PSSST, secret --  Why should i tell her than i was a champion team rower of whaler and cutters while in our Training ship which had 250 cadets . We practised almost daily for 2 years. I used to be the bowman , who had 1:6 ratio on the crutch pivot while the rest of the team had 1:3 ( boat is narrow at the bows )

--and my rowing tendons, were seasoned and tough -- like steel wires..

TEEE--HEEEEEE !




42 comments:

  1. WOW.. what an awesome post.. loved it sir..

    ReplyDelete
  2. You are the greatest and best, Captain!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ajitji,
    In arranged marriages, we have very less time say 5 to 10 minutes to meet and understand the other person.

    What questions to be asked or traits you suggest so that we can judge within those 5 minutes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ho yogesh,

      i have completed 30 years of successful arranged marriage.

      my wife duck tailed her walk in talked to me for 3 minutes and then duck tailed her walk away to the kitchen.

      while coming in i could see that she had a good figure and face.

      after she kept the tea , i had a conversation for 3 minutes.

      her voice was not like mr wolf.

      She answered my 3 or 4 questions with a smile. i noticed she was not a dehati behenjee.

      --and i would NOT be shy of taking her with me on my ship as "OLD MAN'S WIFE" , for i was a captain of ships.

      i already knew the answers to these questions.

      --while she walked away, i could see she had hair almost till her knees.

      after i got married one day i pounced on her " did you entice me with your long manicured nails- for i reckon you flashed them a wee bit?

      so after a bit of a coaxing she said " yes!'

      and then i said " what about the duck tailing like on a ramp/"

      so after a bit of coaxing she said "yes!"

      MOST OF THE DETECTIVE WORK AND INQUIRY INTO HER CHARACTER AND FAMILY WAS DONE BEFORE HAND.

      you dont use your head here, you use your heart.

      and you use your gut feeling too.

      punch into google search GUT FEELING AND INTUITION VADAKAYIL

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..


      Delete
  4. Well you are right on the intuition part.

    But for the spying, I think mostly it produces wrong results. The family enquires through neighbors. Good grooms are portrayed as bad due to jealousy by the neighbors and vice-versa. Like you want to know about India from Pak and Bangladesh. I have seen a few prospective marriages undone specially in villages.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi yogesh,

      in such matters you dont rely on just one source.

      you must be able to see through jealousy if you are smart.

      THE MOST IMPORTANT IS -- DOES THE GIRL TAKE MEDICINES TO CONTROL PARANOIA OR HYSTERIA ?

      IS SHE THE TYPE WHO OPENS OUT HER LEGS TO ANY BOY SHE FANCIES?

      there are questions you do NOT ask in a direct manner.

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
  5. In my humble opinion:

    Love marriage is an arranged marriage managed entirely by PARA PARA SIVAN + PARA PARA SIVAI (Original & never changing parents of Aathma)...

    In arranged marriage, they choose...
    In love marriage, they decide...


    A crude rhyme...
    Arranged Marriage is MATRIMONIAL
    Love Marriage is MATRIPINEAL

    Thank you for this space, Respected Ajit

    ReplyDelete
  6. Nice article. Just re-read it again. Do you anything else to add vis-a-vis the same topic?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi s,

      punch into google search-
      NAGGING, UNHAPPINESS AT HOME , DEATH OF MARRIAGE VADAKAYIL

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
  7. Captain, I have a question.
    My mother recently brought a match for me.
    The girl's father and my mother share the same grandfather.
    Is this permissible in Sanatana Dharma? Will there be any issues with children?
    I would deeply appreciate your advice in this matter, please do let me know.

    Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi n,

      if you do NOT love the girl -- AVOID !

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
  8. Captain, I met her only once. There is no love or lack of love involved here. I wanted to know if marriage between us is allowed, and if there would be any issues with children, since my mother and her father share the same grandparents.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi n,

      avoid it !

      punch into google search-
      GOTRA SYSTEM , KHAP RULES , Y CHROMOSOME , DNA , GENETIC BIRTH DEFECTS VADAKAYIL

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
  9. Really great post captain ji.
    A lesson for the newly married couples and present generation to understand the real meaning of marriage and not just a legal contract to live together and have coitus.
    Captain ji, I would feel pride if you write an article "comparing women in hinduism and in western civilization since antiquity"
    This is the need of the hour to enlighten the juvenile girls and women about the realities and how our scriptures were fabricated to suit the vested interest of a few. I will wait for your this post exhuming the truth out of falsehood.

    God bless you

    ReplyDelete
  10. namaste sir

    congrats on account of your elder son engagement. wishing your family that this be the start of a long and wonderful journey.marriage is on which date. can i attend the marriage.

    regards
    Nelson Singh

    ReplyDelete
  11. HI Captain

    Somewhere in comment column of urs blog I came to know that day marriages are actual hindu vedic way rather than night marriages.

    Would you please write post on our ancient vedic way of marriages from the beginning starts from matching horoscope till the end greh pravesh of bride?

    ReplyDelete
  12. HI CAPT. WHO IS RT'S ANISSA NOUAI?

    ReplyDelete
  13. If horoscopes of a couple didn't match, they may or may not engage in fights and nagging eachother all the time or sometimes.
    But if a couple fights and nag all the time, surely their horoscopes didn't match, right?

    ReplyDelete
  14. I find these pages more sanctum than any real life Temple within my current reach
    Hence I pray here
    may that dusky damsel and me sail this and and every coming prospective life together till we get moksha

    ReplyDelete
  15. Dear sir,
    I am having a problem with my wife.
    she is very short tempered,and becomes very angry for simple issue, and also having suspicious over me that i may having some affair with some body ..It's now 4 yrs our marriage happened and we are having 2 kids ,now this short temperament is very severe.she is also having little jealousy , but if she is in good mood she is a good homemaker.. how to handle her ??

    pls help.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi n,

      god created women this way.

      marriage is a compromise-- if you must make it work.

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
    2. Thank you sir for this great post.

      Delete
    3. Please record all conversation.Get a BPD test done on her.Start collecting all evidences from today.

      Delete
  16. http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/bengaluru/More-couples-inking-prenups-to-avoid-ugly-divorce-battles/articleshow/51771597.cms

    ONLY PICKLE JOHNS AND CHUTNEY MARYS SIGN PRE NUPITIAL AGREEMENTS.

    BECAUSE FOR THEM SEX IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN A SENSE OF BELONGING.

    BELIEF WORKS BOTH WAYS.

    TILL DEATH DO WE PART

    OR

    TILL FAILED BLOWJOB DO WE PART

    SUCCESS OF MARRIAGE IS A SELF FULFILLING PROPHECY-- WHAT YOU EXPECT WITH CONFIDENCE IS WHAT YOU GET .

    TO EXPECT DIVORCE - IS ALMOST DIVORCE ITSELF RIGHT AT THE STARTING BLOCK.

    capt ajit vadakayil
    ..

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hi Captain Ji,

    Why has this come to pass???? -

    DC Special: Kerala is India's divorce capital
    http://archives.deccanchronicle.com/130403/news-current-affairs/article/dc-special-kerala-indias-divorce-capital

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi v

      HINDUS IS KERALA ARE NOW A MINORITY

      WE HAVE CHRISTIANS / MUSLIMS AND COMMIE ATHEISTS MORE.

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
  18. Hi Guruji,
    As I told you earlier My wife has put 498A and the case has just started.I got bail and the chargesheet will be filed by next month.My life,job,personal feeling everything has shattered and feeling very hopeless sometimes. Could you write a article on how to fight 498a cases . What is your personal suggestion to me .
    Please give your suggestion.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi j

      file for divorce

      get rid of this woman from your life

      start a fresh life

      judges are now aware of false 498 a cases--

      she has to produce evidence--

      from where is she gonna get it ?

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
    2. Guruji,
      Its NOT easy to file divorce and get it as she will claim that because I want divorce I was torturing her.I agree she is a BITCH. I have 2 half girl kid which she has taken. I have to fight in JFMC court first .Long battle ahead.Putting 498A on husband has become a tool to extract money .WCD is working for these kind of fake law.this is my 6th year of marriage.Waiting for some kind of miracle.
      Thnaks
      J

      Delete
  19. Sir there's one doubt that when marriages in Maharashtra we throw rice (Akshada called in marathi) on Wedding couple while Pandits reciting mantras..is it right ritual??if yes then what is the iimportance of throwing rice??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. FOR MY ELDER SONs WEDDING --BEFORE THE WEDDING CEREMONY --EVERY IMPORTANT RELATIVE AND WELLSWISHER SPRINKLED UNBROKEN RICE ON HIS HEAD

      AFTER THE WEDDING SAME IS DONE ON THE COUPLE AS SOON AS THEY ENTER THE HOUSE

      Showering Akshata on the bridal couple is associated with fertility. Rice is a symbol of fertility.

      When akshata is offered to them, benevolent energy and vibrations develop in the akshata.

      COUPLE OF DAYS AGO WHEN I DID SHRADDH FOR MY MOTHER ( INSIDE THE HOME ) I SPRINKED AKSHATA RICE ON THE LAMP AND FOOD OFFERED .

      AKSHATA ( UNBROKEN RICE ) IS THE FINEST OFFERING IN SANATANA DHARMA

      Delete
    2. Thanks Sir for clearing my doubt....and sorry i mispronounce the word(Yes it is Akshata).i got a post message in Whatsapp in the Name of from Nana patekar's blog said that don't throw and waste Akshata in weddings ceremoney's by throwing on couples and donate same for hungry peoples and instead "throw Flowers on wedded couples"..will it have any effect??

      Delete
    3. Is throwing Flowers really makes any sense??

      Delete
  20. a relaxing instrumental - https://disk.yandex.com/d/qTEs3SH6xhePV

    justice is done with a good quality headphone

    courtesy: from 01:28 to 09:28 of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-6B2zyoFsI

    ReplyDelete
  21. Namaste Ajith Garu, here is good news to share with you, my engagement got fixed. It's on 9th Dec'16. There is perfect match between mine and girl's birth kundali and stars. My pandit also told with my amma garu that post marriage my career will moves up, plenty prosperity with presence of this girl. Guru garu, want your blessings and my humble request to share few lines - how one should perform engagement as per Hindu dharma, please. In fact, I searched for it.. instead I found above subject. So, iam posting from this comments section. Thanks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JAGADISH

      I AM NOT A GURU

      I AM A RETIRED SHIP CAPTAIN WHOSE BEER IS RUNNING OUT -- BECAUSE ROTHSCHILDs APCO BRANDED MODI HAS CHOOTS TO ADVISE HIM...

      ANY WAYS--

      YOU HAVE MY BLESSINGS-- SHRESTHAM PUTRAM LABASWAHAH

      MARRIAGE IS A COMPROMISE -- DROP YOUR EGO ON DAY ONE

      GIVE LOVE AND GET LOVE IN RETURN

      HARMONY AT HOME IS THE THE GREATEST GIFT

      DO NOT DO ANYTHING WHICH CAUSES YOUR WIFE TO LOSE RESPECT

      http://ajitvadakayil.blogspot.in/2010/05/marriage-sans-fights-capt-ajit.html

      capt ajit vadakayil
      ..

      Delete
  22. Capt. Ajit Vadakayil
    December 16, 2016 at 8:26 PM
    http://indianexpress.com/article/sports/badminton/pv-sindhu-beats-carolina-marin-in-straight-games-at-bwf-world-super-series-final-4430713/

    SUPER SINDHU KEE JAI...

    IMAGINE THAT EGO LADEN FEMALE ""DEEPA MALIK " ( RIO PARALYMPICS SHOTPUT SILVER ) WANTS TO BE TREATED SAME SAME AS DIPA KARMAKAR.

    FOR ME DIPA KARMAKAR IS INDIAs DARLING NO 1 ATHLETE.

    THIS GIRL FULL OF HUMILITY MADE US INDIANS BELIEVE IN OURSELVES .

    NOBODY CAN TAKE THIS AWAY FROM HER..

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyNxHWc4rPM

    BALLS TO "SPEACIALLY ABLED " DEEPA MALIK WHO WANTS EGO MASSAGE GHADI GHADI--AND GOES TO TOWN WITH ENDLESS SELF PRAISE

    WE DONT MIND WHEN HERO USAIN BOLT BOASTS. HE IS WORTH IT...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    #######
    rajesh maurya
    December 17, 2016 at 4:50 PM

    Capt Shri,

    Deepa malik has too much superiority syndrom like many army wives have. Without substance they just hung on falthu authority and try to claim superiority. Pathetic

    Delete
    ##########
    Capt. Ajit Vadakayil
    December 17, 2016 at 7:57 PM

    AS SOON AS SHE WON THE RIO PARALYMPICS SHOT PUT SILVER , SHE HAD HER DAUGHTER ON TV, STATING THAT HER MOTHER WANTS TO START A SPORTS ACADEMY.

    I WAS WATCHING THIS WITH MY WIFE

    I TOLD MY WIFE " THIS IS AS STUPID AS A MANDHA BUDDIs SON , WHO WON MATH OLYMPIAD ( GOT THE CLOSEST ANSWER 2+2=5 ) STATING ON TV THAT HIS FATHER WANTS TO START A MATH ACADEMY -- SO GOVT OF INDIA-- PLEASE DONATE 100 ACRES LAND"

    SHE WAS NOT HAPPY TO HEAR THIS ANALOGY. SHE IS MORE POLITICALLY CORRECT THAN ME.

    AT EVERY SINGLE OPPORTUNITY DEEPA MALIK LAYS IT HAJAAAAR THICK.

    QUINTESSENTIAL PNJAAAABI ARMY WIFE --WHO DREAMS OF KNEDAAA ..

    IT ALL ABOUT HERSELF AND HER HUMONGOUS "SPIRIT " WHICH COULD GIVE CHE GUEVARA A INFERIORITY COMPLEX --IN HIS GRAVE

    ONE OR TWICE IT IS OK-- BUT YOU CANT HAVE THIS SHIT EVERY SINGLE DAY.

    http://ajitvadakayil.blogspot.in/2010/12/spirit-and-che-guevara-capt-ajit.html

    I DARE THIS WOMAN DEEPA MALIK TO HAVE A SHOTPUT COMPETITION WITH MY WIFE .

    WHEN A SPECIAL OR NONSPECIAL WOMAN SITS ON A WHEEL CHAIR, THE EQUATION IS THE SAME. PLAYING FIELD GETS LEVELLED.

    once myself and my wife was armtwisted by my elder son's school headmaster , to come for the sports day--

    --according to this muslim headmaster, my wife was the most respected and worthy parent .

    so i was around doing the medical bit ( i am certified as a ship captain ) ... all attractive school girls over the age of 15 developed some medical problem or other .

    the cardiologist ( my elder son's class mate's father ) with me said "ajit, they are faking it-- they just want attention, --we in the medical profession know what this type of malingering is -- just play along -let it be "

    anyway time came for mother parents sports event.

    female teachers arm twisted my wife to participate in shot put.

    so she gave my two year old younger son to me.

    he was a heavy child.

    today he is 126 kg--the strongest in the gym, -- brute strength--yet very soft hearted , without ego.

    anyways to cut a long story short--my wife threw the shot- almost 4 times further than the 2nd placed mother.

    ALL STARTED LAUGHING -- EVEN MY WIFE STARTED LAUGHING .

    IT WAS SO GODDAMN FUNNY. A THIN FRAIL WOMAN , SO STRONG.. AND THEY ALL LOOKED AT MY HUGE 2 YEAR OLD BABY GLARING AT THEM.

    EVERYBODY AROUND CAME RUSHING TO FIND OUT WHY ALL ARE LAUGHING LOUDLY -- AND THEY ALSO STARTED LAUGHING

    my wife's shoulders were strong --carrying a heavy baby.

    my wife can kick anybody's ass. she won first prize on my ship among young sailors for the high kick .

    THAT TIME TOO ALL STARTED LAUGHING LOUDLY.

    check out the picture of my wife kicking high-- last photo

    http://ajitvadakayil.blogspot.in/2012/06/equator-crossing-ceremony-at-sea-capt.html

    capt ajit vadakayil
    ..

    ReplyDelete
  23. Abcindiagogo
    February 23, 2017 at 11:21 AM

    Captain,

    Patton movie is being telecast right now on Star Movies Select HD.

    The actor is very good !

    And, his "balls of steel" and "don't give a damn" attitude reminded me of you !

    If we have leaders like this, loyalty of people will skyrocket !

    Imagine, if an actor can pull this off in such a consistent manner, inspiring loyalty amongst the movie watching audience,

    Then, it is no wonder that you were, are and will be the most popular Captain ever !!!

    Strict in disciple and other matters but still loved by all !!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    ##################
    Capt. Ajit Vadakayil
    February 23, 2017 at 11:58 AM

    hi a,

    DEEP INSIDE PEOPLE LOVE A STRONG LEADER WHO ENFORCES DISCIPLINE

    THE TRICK IS NOT TO SHOW PARTIALITY

    YET --I GAVE MY OFFICERS "PRIVELAGE OF THE POST"

    AT THE END OF THE MONTH OFFICERS AND CREW LINE UP OUTSIDE MY CABIN TO SIGN THEIR SALARY SHEETS AND PORTAGE BILL

    NO CREW MEMBER DARES TO COME INTO MY CABIN AHEAD OF EVEN THE JUNIOR MOST OFFICER

    IT IS A RECORD I MAINTAINED-- I ALLOW ONLY 20 SECONDS FOR A CREW MEMBER OR OFFICER TO COME IN TO MY CABIN, SIT DOWN BY MY SIDE, SIGN TWO SHEETS ( CREW HAS TO SIGN OVER TIME SHEETS TOO )--

    TAKE A TOKEN PRESENT LIKE A MACKINTOSH QUALITY STREET CHOCOLATE FROM ME- AND BUZZ OFF WITH HIS SALARY SHEET

    I TIME THIS - THIRD MATE IS IN CHARGE OF PHYSICAL MOVEMENTS -I JUST SIT THERE

    I DONT USE COMPANIES SOFTWARE --I USE MINE

    EVERY COMPANY OBJECTED-- I TOLD THEM FUCK OFF .. BECAUSE MY SOFTWARE WAS SUPERIOR ..

    AT SEA NOBODY LIKE A WEAK CAPTAIN-- A SHIT ASS DRIPPING CUNT ...

    THEY LOVE A STRONGMAN WHO PROVIDES A ROOF -- WHO KICKS ASS --WHO MAKES SURE THEY WILL REACH HOME SAFE WITH THEIR HARD EARNED MONEY ..

    I HAVE NEVER BEEN MEAN -- ALL KNOW THAT

    IF SOME SAILOR SCREWS IT UP AND I DONT PUNISH HIM ON THE SPOT--HE WILL FALL SICK

    THEY LOVE MY PUNISHEMNT AND GO BACK TO THEIR CABINS --WITH A SONG ON THEIR LIPS

    WHEN YOU CAN DO THIS-- YOU HAVE ARRIVED AS A LEADER WITH SPIRIT.

    http://ajitvadakayil.blogspot.in/2010/11/blue-ocean-leadership-capt-ajit.html

    IF YOU ASK SAILORS WHO KNOW ME OR HEARD OF CAPT VADAKAYIL--THEY WILL TELL YOU, THERE HAS NEVER BEEN A CAPTAIN AT SEA WHO BLED SAILORS ( WHO DESERVED TO BE BLED )

    I WAS A MENTOR AT SEA —NOT A MERE LEADER . .

    http://ajitvadakayil.blogspot.in/2010/12/mentoring-at-sea-capt-ajit-vadakayil.html

    capt ajit vadakayil
    ..

    ReplyDelete
  24. hi ajit,
    Me and some of my family members have become avid readers of your blog and it is both fascinating and enlightening to read your own anecdotes. My cousin sister who reads your blog considers you no less than a brother herself.
    Anyway since you are enjoying the fruits of a happy marriage i wanted to ask you and hoped you would help me in finding the right groom for my sister or at the very least point me in some direction. We have been trying to find the right alliance for nigh on 4 years now and she is 28. As far as personality is concerned, she is quite strong willed to the point of being a hardline feminist and wants an alpha male as her groom, frequently bemoaning the fact that men nowdays just don't cut it in the arranged marriage market. She belongs to dhanur rasi and is going through sadesati currently. A satisfactory alliance from both abroad and within India has not yet presented itself because apparently many of the boy's families have too much of demands from wanting working wives, dowry, bearing the full brunt of marriage expenses and having to live with the in-laws etc and hence is of the opinion that a career minded woman doesn't and shouldn't settle down to start a family. What advice can you give her and what kind of a groom should we look for since you yourself got your son married off not too long ago? Thanks.

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    1. YOU MUST KNOW THAT AGE IN NOT ON HER SIDE

      SHE MUST GO FOR A MAN WHO WILL TAKE CARE OF HER LIKE GOLD --

      LOOKS DO NOT MATTER MUCH --THE ONLY CONDITION BEING THAT SHE SHOULD NOT BE ASHAMED OF GOING WITH HER HUSBAND TO MEET HER FRIENDS ( THIS IS A PERSONAL THING )

      I HAVE ASKED SEVERAL GORGEOUS WOMEN WHY THEY SETTLED TO MARRY AN ASSHOLE

      ALL GAVE THE SAME REASON-- MOST WOMEN ARE FRANK WITH ME --I DONT KNOW WHY

      REASON: SET THE BAR TOO HIGH BETWEEN THE AGES OF 20 TO 28.

      ONE THEY SEE ALL THEIR FRIENDS AND PEERS HAPPILY MARRIED AND HAVING KIDS -- DESPERATION SETS IN --AND THEY LOWER THEIR STANDARDS --

      BUT IT IS A BIT TOO LATE , AS VERY FEW MEN WANT TO MARRY A GIRL OVER THE AGE OF 30 --WHOSE YAUVAN IS IN TATTERS

      WOULD I HAVE MARRIED MIDDLE AGED AISHWARYA RAI --WHEN SHE FINALLY MARRIED ?

      NO WAY !

      MY WIFE IS A HOUSE WIFE -- SHE COOKS FOR ME --SHE TAUGHT HER CHILDREN --SHE SACRIFICED

      MY GROWN UP SONS LOVE HER --AS THEY KNOW HOW MUCH SHE HAS SACRIFICED

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